i would guess you could get a free pearl necklace no matter where you go, you just have to ask the right a guy.

just kidding. even if i did somehow savor the flavor and texture of the brains of a pig, i don’t think i would ever admit that to anyone. and it wouldn’t matter very long anyway because i’d be dead in about 6 days.

it appears to be the cheapest way to commit suicide ever invented. Maybe 2 or 3 bux?

i have been stuck to the bed the last few days with a weird flu bug but should be back tomorrow. these stories have made me chuckle which, in turn, has freed up some of that throat phlegm. enjoy!

peta requests ben and jerry’s to use breast milk instead of cow’s milk for ice cream. it sounds gross on paper, but it would be kinda neat to see the production facility [abc news]

new nebraska state law allows parents to leave all of your children, up to age 18, at any hospital and the state will take them over without question. it was designed to prevent a baby dumpster ditch, but one man walked in and turned in 9 kids just recently [chicago tribune]

it’s sad but there are probably lots of americans dumb enough to believe this kind of political stuff and the worst part is that my vote counts the same as theirs. i don’t get more votes because i’m smarter or didn’t marry my cousin [smoking gun]

i’ve always believed that flatulence was a gift and never meant to be used in a non-peaceful manner. this guy ruined it. i also personally know a jose cruz and this sounds like something he would definitely do [smoking gun]

and

this should make anyone feel better about the state and quality of their home cleanliness [holy taco]

tina fey gives another dead-on performance as sarah palin. she takes the parody one step further by actually using real quotes from the actual palin/couric interview.

to give him a name like that:

either that, or it’s a well-crafted joke on the tv station.

the juiciest news happens around the 0:45 mark.

this is the first part of sarah palin’s interview with charlie gibson. why is the right-wing so energized over this gal? mayor of a town of 7,000 and then governor of a state that has less people in the entire state than the city of san francisco? insane in the membrane.

ps – i agree with lynda…charlie’s eyeglasses are a distraction resting on his nose like that.

i’m not terribly political but this has been an interesting election season so far. hilary was poised to be the first woman candidate for president but she was overtaken by a half-black guy. both events are noteworthy because of the usual white males clogging up the national political landscape.

so, john mccain just picked sarah palin for his running mate and this was also a surprising move. on one hand, she seems like an ideal candidate because maybe she can pick up some of that woman vote now that hilary is out, although not too likely. she’s also a social conservative, is part of the nra, is strongly in favor of teaching creationism in schools and is against abortion (even in matters of incest or rape). splendid.

anyway, the talk shows are gaga over this pick because there’s so much to talk about. for example, does her lack of experience hurt her? can republicans still attack obama for not having any experience? also, what if mccain passes away (he’s already 72)? is sarah palin suitable to be one heartbeat away from the presidency? she’s been governor of alaska for 2 years only and before that was a mayor of a town in alaska that had a population of less than 7,000. keep in mind that the ENTIRE population of alaska is LESS than that of the great city of san francisco.

the most interesting nugget so far has been the speculation that sarah palin’s last child, a 4-month-old boy born with down’s syndrome is actually her daughter’s child that she has secretly taken as her own. it sounds so far-fetched but there’s some tantalizingly juicy details and supporting observations. obviously, far left news websites have pounced on this, but seemlingly more moderate sites like dailykos have put in some reporting on the topic. key facts include a picture taken of sarah palin at supposedly 7 months pregnant that shows no bulge on her stomach.

her 17-year-old daughter standing next to her seems like she has the belly.

school records show her daughter was out of school for 5-8 months around the time of the pregnancy and the official reason is “mono”. for 5-8 months? anyway, you be the judge – if you’re bored or interested in this kind of stuff.

if this is true, my personal feeling is that sarah palin should be exposed and embarrassed for her coverup and deception. if she’s doing this shizz as governor of alaska, who knows what sort of coverups and lies she’ll spit out as vp of the us. dick and bush already do enough of that to us.

there’s more to read at [dailykos]

someone posted this flowchart of the supposed timing of the baby [imageshack]

i’ve never seen this site before, so i can’t vouch for the quality of reporting, but they have some quoted sources [ireport]

UPDATE: the palin camp put out a press release on sep 1 to say that her daughter is, in fact, 5 months pregnant right now. this would seem to soften some of the above accusations although some conspiracy theorists are still making the numbers fit. even this particular event brings up a good talking point about sarah palin in that she does not believe in teaching sex education at schools and we should rely on abstinence instead. yeah…that worked out really well.

obama told the bloggers to lay off the private lives of candidates, but i think it’s a good indication of their character and how they might like to steer the us if they were to be in power. remember, mccain is 72 and sarah palin could be our president.